Why you cannot say, “I am a Christian and I am gay.”

I am. It is a statement of belonging, of association, of  identity. Humanity is polarized by identities. Identity tells us who we are and where we belong. You might say, “I am English. You are French.” Nowhere, recently it seems, has this polarization become so pronounced as in the debate about homosexuality, marriage, and the church. But is seems that the church has lost itself. It is divided over whether to embrace, accept, or condemn. While some open the pulpits others raise protest signs.

But lets look at it from a personal perspective. I frequently hear someone say it like this; “I am a Christian and I am gay.” Or, “I know that God say that I shouldn’t feel this way, but I can’t help it.” Or the assumption that if you are a true Christian then you can’t feel as you do toward the same sex.

Christians stumble over the question of whether someone who is homosexual should be permitted in a church. The question is asked, can they really be Christian? There is no shortage of opinions and there is a seemingly great disconnect between what the bible commands and what is acted out. But surely an all-knowing God was not so ambiguous on an issue over which He utterly destroyed two cities and thousands of people (Gen 19).

The problem stems partly from bad theology, a logical category mistake, and sinfulness.

Let us first be clear about what God says about homosexuality. The bible in many passages clearly states that it is sin. Therefore is it punishable by death and eternal damnation in hell by the wrath of God. This is not an argument I will make here and encourage anyone to seek out what the bible say for themselves.

For someone to say that they are homosexual brings a stigma, a shunning, an exile by many Christians who fear that this culturally legitimizing this sin will bring the death of the family. These same Christian fail to remember that the bible offers very few model families  – none of which were destroyed because of social normalcy of homosexuality. History bears witness to this. What then? Why the course discourse?

The core of the matter is a confusion on both sides of identity vs action. Take the statement, “I am Christian and I am gay.” To say that you are Christian means that you follow Christ and are daily transforming to be more like Himself (Rom 12). To make the claim, “I am gay” is to claim the identity of a nature that is opposed to and incompatible with any identification with Christ – it is like saying I am blue and I am red. You cannot be both – if you try to be both you end up purple and are neither. You cannot claim an identity in both Christ and sin. By professing Christ, a change of allegiance has occurred.

Instead such a person should claim identity as “I am a Christian and I am a sinner with homosexual temptation.” By claiming identity in Christ homosexuality ceases to be who you are and becomes what you have done.  Homosexuality, just like every other sin, must be repented of, turned from, daily put to death. It is an old nature that must be denied just as any temptation to lust, or greed, or selfish ambition (Eph 4). Just as Christians struggle with temptation toward pornography or adultery or fornication so also some struggle with temptation of homosexuality. It is by the justifying atonement of Jesus, the son of God, that we can stand before God. It is through claiming our identity in Him that He also claims us before the Father (Mat 10). If we claim our identity in anything outside of Christ, then we are dwelling in sin.

And if we as Christians condemn someone for being tempted toward a specific sin then we have ourselves fallen into sin. We have become proud with self-righteous, better-than-thou attitudes reminding those in sin,

“Do you not know that the unrighteous will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived. Neither fornicators, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor homosexuals, nor sodomites, nor thieves, nor covetous, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor extortioners will inherit the kingdom of God.” (1 Cor 6:9-10)

But have forgotten that immediately before and after Paul is  warning against the exact sin that these verses are pulled out of context to achieve.

“And such were some of you. But you were washed, but you were sanctified, but you were justified in the name of the Lord Jesus and by the Spirit of our God.” (1 Cor 6:11)

Let us not forget who we are. We are sons and daughters bought with a price of God’s Son slain for us. Those who find themselves tempted toward homosexuality are no different than any other Christian. They need friends and mentors to come along side and teach them, to strive with them, to cry with them. May we especially remember that those who are outside of Christ and openly embrace sin are no different than what we once were. We should engage them as we would any other sinner, not with protest signs and cutting remarks as if this specific sin will bring about the end of civilization but rather with loving compassion and hospitable friendship so that the Christ’s Love might be shine through us.